Saturday, January 26, 2013

The naive, pre-TTC me

I find it pretty hilarious when I think back on how naive I was when we first started trying to conceive regarding how quickly I thought I'd get knocked up.

Hubby and I got married last June and started trying a few weeks before the wedding. However, it was an extensive conversation deciding whether I should go off the Pill then or 
wait until after the wedding because "how will I feel physically during the wedding and honeymoon if I'm pregnant? What if I can't drink? What if I have morning sickness? Shouldn't we wait to actually get pregnant until after we're married?"  
Oh, naive little me, how silly you were.

I legitimately thought that we'd be able to time conception perfectly so that our baby could be born in a specific month and I could neatly finish up the fiscal year at work before going on maternity leave. Riiiiight.

Now here we are, going on 9 months of trying and I realize just how dumb I was then. And it wasn't even all that long ago!  Now I would just be happy to get KU, period. I don't care what month I'd be due, I don't care what kind of mess I'd leave behind at work, I just want to get pregnant. 

[Huh - I just now realized that had we actually gotten pregnant on that first cycle of trying, we would be getting ready to welcome a little baby next month.  That makes me a little sad.]

Honestly, I'm not so sure I see it happening for us very soon.  Maybe I'm jaded because of my sister's struggles and subsequent infertility, maybe I'm discouraged by my charts and my body's apparent inability to ovulate on it's own, or maybe I'm just wiser now. Regardless, there it is.  I can already picture myself writing a "1 year mark" blog post about the things I've learned and how I've changed since beginning our TTC journey.  What was that I wrote last week about being a positive vs. negative person? ;-)


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